Warning: Do Not Read This

Wouldn’t you rather read something else?

There are many other perfectly nice posts for you to read. Why don’t you read one of those instead? Or better yet, go back to the page you were reading before you found this one, and forget you ever saw this terrible page.

This post, unlike all the other completely safe posts you could be reading right now, contains a recipe for Lemony Snickets. If you know anything about Lemony Snicket, you know that reading this post can only lead to very unfortunate things.

If you insist on proceeding, it’s probably safe to scroll down a little to peek at the photographs below. But really, if you know what’s good for you, you’ll stop reading right now.

I tried to warn you. Now I fear you won’t be able to stop yourself from reading this recipe for Lemony Snickets, and nothing good can come of it. Sure, these cookies look innocent enough, but I implore you to believe me when I tell you that they are anything but innocent. You can still click somewhere else. There’s still time.

Lemony Snickets

(from SheepishOne via a Friend to Knit With)

4 cups all-purpose flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 cup butter
1-1/2 cups granulated sugar
2 eggs
1 tsp vanilla
1 tsp lemon zest (about 1 lemon)
1 container (15 oz) low-fat ricotta cheese
GLAZE:
4 cups confectioner’s sugar, sifted
6 Tbs lemon juice (about 2 large lemons)
sprinkles

1. Preheat oven to 350F. Lightly grease cookie sheets.
2. Whisk together flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt in a medium bowl. In a large bowl, beat butter and sugar on medium speed until creamy, then beat in eggs, vanilla, lemon zest, and ricotta until blended.
3. Add flour mixture and beat until combined. Cover and chill at least an hour.
4. Shape dough into 1-inch balls, and place on cookie sheets.
5. Bake 10 minutes, or until bottoms are light brown. Cool for about 1 minute, then transfer cookies to a wire rack to cool.
6. While they cool, make glaze: Stir confectioner’s sugar and lemon juice in small bowl until smooth. (I added extra lemon juice to make these taste more tangy– I used the juice of 2 and a half lemons.) Drizzle evenly over each cookie. Garnish with sprinkles. Let stand until hardened. (Don’t put these in an airtight container, just cover very lightly if you need to.)

Now you’ve read the recipe, so it’s probably too late for you. But wouldn’t you rather bake something else? Perhaps some oatmeal raisin cookies, or a nice, innocent Bundt cake?